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The Choice Is Yours!

To respond or react in a situation.

You know emotions, you feel emotions, but sometimes they overpower you and your other abilities, so how to navigate your emotions? 

Suppose, you and your friend have decided to study together for upcoming examinations, you both concluded that you will help each other on the topics you find difficult. At the last moment, your friend says that he will not join you for the study session without giving any proper reason. That leaves you a bit frustrated, confused, and angry. How would you certainly react to this situation?

In this situation, you might impulsively text your friend in anger accusing them of being unreliable and selfish, and you might vent out by verbal accuse or gossip to other friends. This is a reactive response that can hinder your friendship and make it awkward for each other.

Here is another response to the same:

1. You think for a moment, pause, and recognize your emotions, probably anger, frustration, or sadness. You then notice what psychological or physical changes it made in you, probably a rush of blood, making you look red, increased heartbeat, trembling hands.  

2. You accept these emotions and try to find ways to calm yourself down and calm yourself. You can then see the difference between the situation of reaction and destroying your relationship.

3. You sit for some minutes in utter silence and take a few deep breaths or practice mindfulness, which makes your body and mind calm. You try to channelize your thoughts and look at how you can communicate your feelings in appropriate manner.

4. You try to keep your point of view and rather than blaming your friend, try to understand their reason and side of the story. You accept their apology and do not make them feel guilty for canceling the plan.

Did you find any difference between the two possible behaviors? The first one described is a “reaction” to the present situation whereas the four points mentioned above are a “response” to the situation.

Reacting involves immediate response driven by emotions without much conscious processing. When we react, our emotions often take the lead, influencing our actions before we have a chance to fully evaluate the situation. 

The second situation is responding, which we engage with in a thoughtful and considerate manner. Responding involves a major degree of self-awareness and emotional intelligence allowing us to manage our feelings and choose a constructive course of action.  It allows them to delve deeper into their emotional world as well as builds a strong orbit with others’ emotions. 

In brief, these are the ways to navigate and respond effectively to a situation:

Recognize your emotion
Become aware of your emotions, what emotion are you particularly feeling, the causes of the emotion, effects of that particular emotion on you or your physiologically or psychologically.

Accept your emotions
Emotions naturally occur, these cannot be avoided and they shouldn’t be. Rather accept it gladly and see what other benefits you might conquer from it. 

Practice mindfulness
Engage in mindfulness practices such as meditation or deep breathing exercises. These practices can help increase self-awareness and improve your ability to recognize and regulate emotions

    Learn emotional regulation
    Learning emotional regulation involves recognizing and managing your emotions effectively. Practicing mindfulness, self-awareness, and coping strategies are key steps to mastering this essential life skill. It fosters resilience, improves relationships, and enhances decision-making

    Seek support when needed
    We all need some help at some point in our lives. Same with emotions, to understand a particular emotion or sometimes when we don’t know what we are feeling, why are we feeling in a certain way, seeking help from our close ones helps us understand their emotions from a broader and newer perspective

      In conclusion, responding and reacting represent distinct different approaches to how individuals engage with situations in everyday life. Reaction is instinctive and immediate and primarily driven by emotions without thorough consideration and control of thoughts and actions. Whereas responding requires empathy, self-regulation, possible outcomes, and strategic decision-making.  

      In our world of emotions, the difference between responding and reacting holds profound significance in shaping our experiences and relationships.

      References

      To know more regarding how to regulate emotions, you may refer to the following: